Jaya Jagadambe Durga Ma

When is the moment that I should let go?

When is the moment to stay my course?

To be diligent... to be graceful?

Is there a situation where one

is more fruitful than the other?

In lacking understanding,

do I give up or do I shine in battle?

I guess the question should be:

How much does this really mean to me?

The real deal is not about the signs and synchronicities.  Those have had their place for certain.  There has been a strong theme of guidance and protection. But what has lead me here are the things I fight against on the inside.  The thing that have seemed impossible, always out of reach ~ or that I'm just not good enough to receive.  Yet ever I seek.

" What does the word 'Exodus' mean?  It means an exit, a going or a getting-out of trouble.  An exit is a way out and, with trouble, the idea is to get out quickly.  The book of Exodus deals with the getting out of evil, because all evil is limitation of one kind or another."

-Emmett Fox, the Ten Commandments, 1953

We put this name on it and give a personality.  We breath life into it with the imagination ~ yet it is our own face looking back at us.    

I've proven my unworthiness to myself time and time again.  Yet even as the tears fall ~ still I pray for the courage to seek Durga's light.  To conquer what refuses to be conquered: my own limitations.  The mere wish for courage is a courageous action.  When we feel this we can create change simply by bringing awareness to it.  Ahhh, now the healing begins!

In every dark hour shines a golden flower. A single grain.  A light, a wish. This is the wish of the great compassionate beings who stoke the sacred fire in their hearts for our betterment every moment of every day.  Their existence is, itself, an offering for blessings along the journey home. 

We can choose to be strong when we feel weak.  Seek from the heart and be grateful, recognizing that whatever the response is - this is the one meant for you at this time.    That can be a hard pill to swallow.  I've surly had my share.

But how else would you grow?  What better medicine is there than to receive the motivation to seek healing?   

As I prepare myself tonight for another step, may it come into my own thoughts for the betterment of others.  May my own betterment and nourishing strengthen me that I may be of service.

Aum namah Sivaya

Aum namah Sivaya

Aum namah Sivaya